Forever In Our Hearts on Valentine’s Day and Every Other

Sharing one of my favorite pieces of love that Lydia made me.  This one has extra special meaning and came to me during a moment when I least expected it.

Below is an excerpt from my story in the book Miracles and Moments of Grace: Inspiring Stories of Survival, by Nancy B. Kennedy.  Remembering our loved ones today on Valentine’s and every other day of the year.  Forever in our hearts.

As I sat crying, sorrow and guilt and anger overwhelmed me.  I told Lydia how sorry I was, sorry that I couldn’t protect her, sorry that I had lived and she had not. I begged to just be able to wrap my arms around her and hold her tight, to tell her I loved her one more time, to know that she loved me.

I found myself pleading with Lydia to let me know she was with me, to give me a sign-something, anything!-to make this journey of grief a little easier.  I looked in the duffel bag and then walked over and looked behind the door.  Moving her green shoe basket aside, I found a folded, yellow piece of paper underneath.  

Slowly, I opened it.  

On the paper, Lydia had drawn a flower and in big letters she had written, “I love you!”  

Instantly, I was covered with goose bumps.  This was more than mere coincidence. At that moment, I knew I could survive the room, that I could survive the loss.  I knew that Lydia loved me. It made me feel so good.

I took pictures and a video of my daughter’s room that day, never wanting to forget an inch of it. I will miss the memories of her in that house, but in the end it’s only a house.  That evening, surrounded by my husband and four other children, I was overwhelmed with my blessings from the Lord, and I finally knew without a doubt that Lydia would be with me wherever I go.